11.11.19

These days I found myself hating what I do for living. At times I don't even remember why I hate it so much. At some point I was thinking I may be going nuts and sometime I think I am right. I am confused and miserable. I felt my cause wasn't heard enough. My talent was put to waste. I do not sense the belonging, I felt empty and angry all the time. Like I said without a reason I am pissed. 

So the other day I have read our Tun M. said that "If you want to be listened (to), you must be very powerful, strong or very rich otherwise nobody listen to you"

Well it hits home. I'm just an executives. Nobody listen even when I screamed out loud. Nobody will ever heard even when I read it directly from the book. So I decide to give up. I thought this is the best things I can do to prevent myself from getting hurt more. So I give up fighting for my ideas, thoughts and wisdom. I just stop. Now I just hate going to work. I called in sick for just mental breakdown. I swear if I cannot find other job by the end of this year my life is dull. 

I was hoping that this shall pass too. It taking too long. I don't like it anymore. I need to move on. I am moving on. It just a matter of time now. Remember this. You are not a tree.