I Decide Not to Decide

 I am still not sure what I want for me. Do I want to get married? Do I want to buy a house? Do I want to change job? Right now I decide not to decide anything. I want to ignore all those burdening questions, so I can sleep better at night. I want practice selfishness. I want to focus on me more. If they love me, they will understand and stay. If they not, they are welcome to leave. I don't want to make rush decision and regret most of it. I don't want to wonder what if. What if not. So I'm not deciding anything right now. I'm just going to enjoy my life as it is. 

I found that I can take my mind off when I'm teaching. So I'll focus on my teaching. As of now, I'm at peace.